You saw it, didn’t you? A flash of caution that your gut is telling: “Run away”. But another feeling was clogging your better judgement. You were drowning in misery, overwhelmed with loneliness, your foot on the accelerator, going fast into your rabbit whole. Down. Down. Down. And you thought he was an escape? A temporary distraction? A companion? Or maybe.. possibly, a solution? No. No. Just runaway.
A cue to that pattern, a destructive mindset reawaken. An addict had a taste of morphine: dangerous, contradicting and wrong. A trepidation of such behavior had set a part of you to change. Because that small voice knows better. That tiny spark that you are sadly ignoring. You don’t know what you want. You don’t know what you deserve. Just runaway. Decide later, run away.
Don’t be a cautionary tale. Walk away. You saw it. Run. Go. But… you are now here. His face in your hands. Your lips almost touching. You delve in. With all your angst, your loneliness, your pain: you delve in. You let the toxin spread all over your body, controlling you.
So.. was it all worth it? Being taken over? How does it feel after the rush? It’s unbelievable, right? You have never thought you could go this low until today. You never imagined you would feel this pain until you lie there helplessly, wishing death with come. But.. Possibly.. In all this chaos, for a minute.. Even for a minute.. have you ever thought if you deserve going through this? Should it go this far?
Self, Red Flags and Warning signs. Runaway. Runaway.